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There are things that just can’t wait: a doctor appointment, a dentist appointment, a school appointment, … okay, any kind of set appointment usually can’t wait. Potty breaks can only wait so long. Blood, cuts, stings, bites – most things that bring tears need close to immediate attention, or the crying/screaming just gets louder. Some spills can’t wait, some messes, some visitors, some discipline, … some things just can’t wait.

But there are many things that can.

Unloading the dishwasher takes a bit more time but other things can wait.

The vacuuming, the dishes, the bathrooms, the laundry, the phone calls, the candy crush, the errands, the dinner, the bedtime, the leaving (if it’s not because you’re headed to an aforementioned appointment), some of those spills, messes, visitors, discipline, … some things can wait.

We are in a very fast moving, extremely slow season in our life right now. Our children are growing and changing so incredibly quickly that I literally cannot believe how much time has gone by, yet the days linger and seem to drudge on quite slowly. Any kind of activity flies by but the process making it to the activity, and then the subsequent leaving from the activity is an exercise in diligence and patience. It seems to be so especially right now, while little Lady Bug has a very strong aversion to the car (not the carseat, just once she’s in the car. It’s lovely) and does much better with a full tummy. This means that to get the boys ready, clean up from whatever messes we have made, say goodbyes, load the car, arrange and buckle everyone in carseats, our darling baby needs to be “topped off.”

So to make the car rides bearable (it really is that bad) I have had to decide some things have to wait. When leaving family gatherings we often get everyone ready, clean up, corral children with books or an episode of Blue’s Clues (thank you Amazon Prime!) and I nurse our Lady Bug. This means bedtime has to wait. The no children/veg time has to wait. Any adult, difficult, deep conversations with Mr. Average have to wait. Sleep, oh dear sweet sleep, has to wait. But in the end, it’s worth it because all children fall asleep in the car, instead of each one setting off the next into inconsolable wails of exhaustion. That is definitely worth the wait!

Sometimes there is a doctor’s appointment that you just can’t miss. Sometimes the baby has just woken up and is hungry, the boys have decided to not eat the lunch you set out for them, you may have to change baby from head to toe and quickly wash her off because apparently the diaper couldn’t wait, and you have to pile everyone in the car and book it to an appointment that just won’t wait. Sometimes that happens. I know. Boy do I know.

But this time, once we are at the appointment, things slowed down. There were a few minutes to wait before we were called back to the examination room, there were a few minutes before the doctor came in, there were a few minutes before we had to race home for the next thing on our to-do list that just couldn’t wait. There were just a few minutes.

While we were waiting during those few minutes in the examination room I picked up Put Me in The Zoo, just a children’s book they had available, and began reading it to Mister and Tudders. The boys were intrigued and I was happy to distract them. But the doctor came quickly and our appointment wasn’t long, so before I knew it, we were done. Mister was a bit disappointed that we didn’t finish the book so I toted the four of us back into the lobby/waiting area for some storytime.

To be completely honest I wasn’t ready to tackle returning to the car just yet. To manage I would have one child holding each hand and Little Lady in a carrier strapped to my chest. I needed to mentally get ready to direct my children out of the office, through a maze of wonderfully enticing toys, games, decor, and people, into an elevator with buttons just asking to be pushed, out of the building, though the busy parking lot, and back into car seats. I just needed a minute, and maybe my boys did too.

I gathered us all onto some chairs and picked up the book again to begin where we had left off. Tudders found another toy (I’m telling you, this office knows the definition of “enticing toys”) and played quietly at my feet while Mister kneeled up next to me, Ladybug craned her head around to see the pictures, and we finished the book. The ride home could wait. The dishes in our sink would wait. The clothes wrinkling in the dryer could wait, and being dried again to get those wrinkles out (because we all know the ironing is going to wait, for a while!) wouldn’t be the worst thing.

We didn’t need to rush. We had the luxury of waiting. And I’m grateful.

Sometimes I can easily identify and better yet, anticipate when and what things can wait. Sometimes I really struggle.

Sometimes while I’m in the midst of making dinner I have a child who just keeps after me to do something. I can’t seem to distract them with anything, I can’t convince them to play with, read, or watch anything. If I can see that we have the luxury of waiting I can turn off the stove, put down my spoon and sink to the floor. I cuddle my little one in my lap and we read a story, or I sit at the table and help roll out play dough, or help secure the cape and mask and chase my little super hero around the house for a few minutes.

It makes all the difference! Instead of being frustrated and irritated, I’m reminded why I place an importance on dinner in the first place. Instead of a child in tears at my feet for being put off or snapped at, I have a child who is content, feels loved, important, listened to, and is happy.

When these days are long past, the appointments, the dinner menu, the errands, the to-do lists will be forgotten. The little snippets of time spent laughing, reading, playing, listening, talking, praying, singing together will add up to be much greater than the “essentials” that we were rushing to complete. It’s in recognizing and making the most of those snippets, allowing some things to take a back seat, that we can make the most of our time and influence, develop a foundation on which to build a lasting relationship. It’s in the forcing ourselves to slow down.

You know, there are just some things can wait.

Image 1: Accidental Mother/Son Portrait, Andy Malmin at flickr.com; Some rights reserved, see license for more information; Text addition and size editing has been done by averagejosie.com. Use of this image does not indicate the artist has any affiliation with or participates in the promotion of this site or its contents.