Sometimes the idea of preparing my children for school is so overwhelming. Will they know their numbers? Colors? Shapes? Will they know how to write their name? Do they need to know how to add? Subtract? Read? Will they listen? Be kind? Share? Obey? The things they teach in school these days seems far ahead of what the expectation was for these little learners even 10 years ago. I have come across some easy ways to introduce some learning opportunities without stressing (myself or my children) out.
Recognizing Numbers
My children love dice. They love to shake them and then let ‘em fly. We have Phase 10 dice game. The game itself is a fun twist on the original card game, which is fun on it’s own merit. I decided there was no point in trying to teach a 4 and 2 year old how to make a set of 4 and a run of 4 and instead I modified the game slightly. OK, so I made up a new game. I wrote down the numbers one – ten and gave each child 3 dice. Each time they rolled they could mark off the number they rolled. They loved to play with mom, love using pens to mark off their numbers, loved to roll wilds where the power was in their cute little hands to pick any number to mark off, and especially love rolling the dice. Within a few games Mister was recognizing numbers on his dice and matching them to the number on the paper. He helped Tudders identify what he could mark off and could count how many each of us had before we won. High five for number recognition!
What’s in a Name
A name is a pretty important thing. Typically a child will recognize the first letter of their name and point it out wherever they see it. Tudders is the perfect example of this. He sees T’s everywhere and is sure they are for his name. On papers, on food, on cars, in the cracks on the sidewalk, branches of trees, T for Tudders everywhere! Mister recognized a letter from the middle of his name before he started pointing out the first letter of his name. He wanted us to put an S on his toys, his ball, his shoes, his papers. Of course, you know – S for Mister. 
Even so, I took it as a win. He was identifying letters and knew they were in his name. As he started to recognize more letters I started writing his name letter by letter while I held his sweet little hand. Then we graduated to Mister writing the letters while I prompted him. Sometimes I would write his name first and he would copy it to his art masterpiece. One favorite autograph was when he signed his name to his Grandpa’s Father’s day card. I instructed him to write it with little letters so it would fit in the card (children are very proud of writing their name and want to be sure everyone can see it!). He wrote his name carefully and small as instructed. When he was finished he started to giggle. The giggling escalated and turned into a full on laugh. “Mom! Look how little!! It’s so cute!” His little name did look pretty adorable. Mister is now writing his name by memory. I’ll be so sad when his cute letters look like the standard ABC’s. I love how he writes his backwards S’s and “circle-line-line” R’s.
I Can Read with My Eyes Shut
No. Mister cannot read with his eyes shut. He’s not reading at all yet. Is your four year-old reading? That’s wonderful! Really! Mine isn’t and that’s ok too. Is your six year-old struggling? Hang in there. It’ll come. Children develop at their own pace. Unfortunately with a standardized education it is tough to be outside, or have your children outside, of that “normal” bell-curve. We started with letter recognition and have moved on to phonetic recognition with these letters that they love to play with in the tub – and chew on inside and outside of the tub. (We have sev.er.al with teeth marks.) 
Mr Average helps both Mister and Tudders sound out words and blend sounds together. They are recognizing some letters based on their sound and I’m not worried about them reading yet. I am convinced (and much of the research agrees) that reading to your children will greatly increase their reading ability, and their desire to read. Some children want to be read to for a really. long. time. Others are ready to pick up a book and read to themselves long before their peers. Learning disabilities can cause frustration and a loathing for books. My mother would make books on tape for us by reading the chapter out loud and record it for us to listen to later. The only rule? We had to follow along with the book. Reading out loud, or have a child listen to an audio book (professionally or privately <wink> recorded) teaches rhythm, phrasing, pausing, emphasis, and increases comprehension. Having these aspects of reading modeled directly affects how a child will read and how much they will comprehend. We visit the library often and read a large variety of books – almost exclusively from the children’s and picture book sections. I am surprised with how much information they absorb and what kind of understanding the gather about the world. So for now we read together and with the favorites in our library, I can actually read with my eyes shut!
Butterflies and Wallflowers
I have decided that children, through no fault/influence of a parent will be who they will be. This reaches into almost every aspect of their lives, including socially. Some children are outgoing, social, friendly, and have a hard time understanding stranger danger, because once you say hello and introduce yourself they are no longer a stranger, right? Others cling to a parent’s leg, are always at your heels, hide in your skirt folds and struggle to say goodbye to relatives because they have to do it “on their own.” Some children swing back and forth through these two extremes and others land somewhere in the middle. With this in mind, I firmly believe that children can be taught to be kind, considerate and polite. They learn how interact with people in a way that is comfortable to them: high fives, knuckles, a hello from Mom’s arms, a goodbye while holding Dad’s hand, leaving the group to play alone if necessary, or finding a trusted adult when things get rough.
Sharing is Caring
As important as it is to help my children feel in control of their environment and have the power to feel safe and comfortable, it is as important that they learn to share and be kind. I am a firm believer in letting a timer be the dictator. With the timer set Mister knows he has two more minutes before he must share let his brother have a turn. Tudders knows he’ll get a turn as soon as he hears the “ding”. They both know they must use their hands and bodies kindly. Do they always? No, but they are 2 and 4, and we are working on it. Daily. I also allow for them to have “their” toy or book or treat. They have the option, at times, to not share. It brings tears from the other brother but a lesson as well. Quickly the non-sharing is reciprocated and the benefits of sharing are brought home. They also are encouraged (taught how to) evaluate if they really need their brother to leave whatever it is alone, or if it is ok to share. It is inevitable that a fight will break out over some toy or food or sock (really? Who fights over socks?) and Mr. Average and I have tried really hard to teach the phrase “Mom! Dad! Help!” as an alternative to punching, hitting, kicking, pushing, or sitting on the offender. Sometimes sharing is just hard and Mom and Dad need to help.
We may not be ready for kindergarten yet. You know, we may not be ready for the extended family dinner on Sunday, but we are taking it one day at a time. Letting our little ones be little and encouraging them as they are ready and excited to stretch is the best way to nurture and support their progression. Now is the time for fun learning in a non-pressured environment. Letting my babies be small is something I’m learning to embrace. It certainly doesn’t last very long!
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